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That's W.H. Wool Hat! You've heard of W.H. Wool Hat? You've
heard of wool hats? That's him!
They have about as much chance of finding us here as I do of becoming Miss
America! [knock is heard] Mike sings .. "There she is Miss
America"
Man I'm reading next weeks script ... gonna try and save IT!
from Royal Flush
That's ok I eat on the floor.
I got it, I got it, I don't got it!
It wasn't the cleaning lady, she comes the 3rd Thrusday of every month
with an R in it.
Why would they want to sabatoge us?
It's a key to open a file. It's a skeleton key.
It's a watch fob for the jolly green giant.
from Monkee Mayor
I still get spells sometimes that I can't account for.
Babysitting? Madam, we're musicians, we can't give up years of study
and involvement. However, if the price is right....
wait a minute, kids love me, they adore me. I'll take care of this kid.
Would ja take my hand, it gives me a feeling of security.
Why don't you go down halfway... come up here and tell me.
How come I'm all clean and you're all dirty?
from The Christmas Show
I'm the 23 hour doorman, I used to be the 24 hour doorman but I couldn't
take the long hours.
At least we know the murderer is very neat.
I'll believe it when I see it. I believe it.
from Monkee See Monkee
Die
My mother used to call me goo goo eyes.
Fixed it so their search lights didn't work... busted out in the day time.
What am I going to do with an earring?
from Alias Micky Dolenz
Pick up your arms and fight for what's yours.
Pig pig pig, I'm playing the pig... pig pig pig...
Isn't that dumb?
Buzz off yokal!
from Hillbilly Honeymoon
Hey your got some friends pete? Bring um over someday.
My mommy won't let me play with toys that burn or bash or scratch or go
boom...
from Monkees vs Machine
Can you say she sells sea shells by the sea shore?
Peter, we're gonna try and scare ya, so don't be scared.
Hey I'm gettin' dizzy man.
from The Case of the
Missing Monkee
Devil or not, he's a rotton house guest.
You
know what even more scary? You can't say _ _ _ _ on television.
from the Devil and Peter
Tork
I wouldn't go on any where after those guys, their really seedy.
A small minoirty, a small minority like a tribe of African pygmies, yeah
a small minority.
I was kidnapped when I was a kid once, but my family was so ppor they gave
the ransome note to the neighbors.
I'm gonna be a Thstar....
I got an idea, I can't think with this blub hanging over my head [pop]
Thank you!
from your Friendly Neighborhood
kidnappers
Do fish swim?
A man in love has the strength of thousands.
Peter, you can't expect the writers to know everything. Improvise.
Please, no morals.
from Monkees Get Out
More Dirt
I can't tear it, I couldn't be that weak. I can't tear this card.
Don't do that!
How 'bout if I kick him? Biting?
I'm a believer.. I'm a believer!
I
have a mind.. no I don't have a mind.. I lost mine but I have a body..
I don't have a body either
from I was a 99lb Weakling
Hello chief, send in Swartz, Harold B.
Thankyou Yaci Moto that'll be all for today.
Spy confession take four.
from The Spy Who Came
in From the Cool
You do and I'll be sorry.
It's great its terrific it's the best show on earth... It's a theme song
from an old TV series.
Four our first act we could get out of town.. it's a small joke, about
[ that ] big!
from Monkees At the Circus
[What is a long haired weirdo?]
A
local fish you catch it with a sharp stick.
Isn't
this fun?
Bore
bore bore bore....
from Monkees mind Their
Manor
[How would you held a lady into the
back of my car?]
As
quickly as I can!
I'll
give you 10A... that's over the wing, of course most people would rather
sit inside the plane.
I'll
do my impression of Davy Jones ... ga ga goo goo
from Success Story
You're
getting heavier Davy, I can remember when you only weighed 7 bars.
I'll
certanily keep it mended [what?] the fence.
The
Secretary of Defense is never cute. Their ruthless, ambitious and power
hungry.
I
really hate these interviews Bob. I really hate these interviews. I really
hate these interviews Mike.
from Everywhere a Sheik,
Sheik
I
think we're in a lot of trouble Pronto.
Alright
now we gotta go in there and act tough!
Not
now, this is a family show.
Wanna
see me draw? Wanna see it again?
Wadia
mean injun?
Flies
no, but if you're a human he'll kill ya!
from Monkees in Texas
He
was no bargain in the shade.
That's
for the benifit of any of you who have tuned in late... now... back to
our story.
We'll
bunt a lot
This
is the moment when the cavalry usually rides up, don't trust the cavalry.
from Monkees in a Ghost
Town
Have
a dime for a cup of coffee.
Do
you realize you have a Monkee on your back?
Someday
I'd like to make something that will last, something that's important,
something I can say is my own.
from Monkees on Tour
Could
it be my clothes are putting me on?
Don't
listen to him head.. he's only kidding head.
Whenever
a pussy cat cries they tear off its head, then they holler in it's ear,
then they put the head back on the body. I don't know how it stays alive!
Don't
tear off that cats head again, I can't stand it!
No
my feet aren't on backwards, yours are.
I
don't drive, I rust easily.
I
am mankinds friend, tender, kind and loveing. Faithful to the end, this
is a recording. That must of been my poetry tube.
From Monkees Watch Their
feet.
Horses
don't eat salami
I'm
supposed to milk the chickens.
Just
proves how far out in the country we really are... the milkman doesn't
even deliever here.
from Don't look a Gifthorse
in the Mouth
Of
course he's sick, he has sham when he was twelve years old.
[Peter: "How's my heart beat?"]
Fine,
but the melody don't make it!
Goodbye
broadway, hello failure.
from Monkees in Manhattan
That
was my medium scare.
I'm
scared I'm scared! Let's get outta here!
Ify
ou got lost, i'll be a single! Hey hey I'm a Monkee!
You
oughta get a haircat, they won't let you into Disneyland.
Don't
worry my middle name is danger.. of course my last name is chicken.
from Monsterous Monkee
Mash
Ya
and I'm gonna be his mother-in-law
from The Chaperone
This
place loks like it was condemned before it was built.
from I was a Teenage
Monster
Caught
like a rat in his own trap.
from Art For Monkees
Sake
Gootchi
gootchi goo baby.
I
wanna help Peter too, but I can't.. he's a bird brain.
from Here Comes the Monkees
I
myself am deeply jealous.
I'm
gonna bring mine home, give me something to read in bed.
Gosh
a rooney, it's only a girl scout.
Girl
scout my....
from Too Many Girls
He
did, he said get out in ten minutes or I'll beat you up.
Boy
Peter you sure know how to use your mouth.
Captain
Hornblower man, ya groovy.. sock it to me..
Peter's
so tough his nails get rusty.
Polly
want a bust in the mouth?
from Hitting the High
Seas
A
minute and tweleve secords.. that's a new meeting record.
They'll
never know the difference.
Ya
the Poiple Flower Gang objects.
Do
ya know how hard it is to get poiple flowers?
That's
not my station.
from Monkees A La Carte
No
no you ...find the cookie..get the Monkee then cook the cookie.
No
no no.. you monk the cookie..cook the Monkee then find the cookie
Your
crutches?
I
didn't say we made money ..I said we sing.
from Monkees Chow Mein
I
don't like it it's to quiet....I don't like it...it's to noisy!
No
Peter not behind the chair... he's playing for keepsies.
Can't
use your hand Davy...it's in meters man.
from Monkees Marooned
This
looks like a job for Monkee men!
We've
come to tune the piano Charlie..he does the black keys..he does the white
keys and I do the cracks.
Please
no fawning...why must they always fawn?
from I've Got a Little
Song Here
Here
we are in the land of make believe...look at that rock... it's a phoney
rock.. look at that fish it's a phoney fish...look at hat girl... Oh Ya....
He's
made so many B pictures he's getting fan mail from hornets.
You're
right.. we have to save him from himself.
from Monkees At The Movies
It's
not the passing beyond that bothers us so much.. it's the coming back.
Asprin
in disguise..I don't believe it.
Now
that's a trip!
Isn't
that dumb?
from A Coffin To Frequent
But
it sure keeps your foot tapin' don't it?
I
don't even like him that much.
I
love you twice as much on Fridays because I want the weekend off.
He's
probably very kind to dumb animals.
You've
heard of th New York Stock Exchange? Well he owns the New Tork Stock Exchange.
Which
just goes to prove you CAN make a silk purse out of a sows ear if you haven
enough good silk.
from One Man Shy
Don't
beat around the bush man... do you want us for the run of the show or not?
What's
in this thing... a dead body?
With
a little more ego he could be President.
Talk...never...they
can torcher him..beat him.. drug him... he'll never talk.
There's only one torcher he can't with
stand... I pray they don't use that...The direct question.
I
don't wanna be a chicken ...I don't wanna be a chicken... I don't wanna
be a chicken... I'm a chicken...I'm a chicken...
from Card Carrying Red
Shoes
Little
joke .. about that big.
Gosh
o rooney....
One
two... cha cha cha...one two cha cha cha...
from Dance Monkee Dance
I'd
like to see somebody try something like that again.
I
didn't think they'd hear me!
A
virtual Disneyland for shutins.
Isn't
that dumb?
Why
should I break it for you? Your just a chick.
Number
three.. you can really, really get hurt.
We've
been ready since dawn... we just had to rinse out a few things.
from The Wild Monkees
What's
today? It was Peter...Peter puts the filth down on Mondays.
My
arms... I can't move my arms.
I'm
sorry no more vancancys.
Chew
carefully ..how you going to be President if you don't chew carefully.
from Monkee Mother
Don't
ask me... I don't know!
WELL
WHO NEEDS IT!!
That
means that one of us is going hafta be a chick.
After
all... what is a woman but a rag, a bone and a hank of hair.
[Davy.. How do I look?]
Kinda
like a raggy, hairy bone.
Money,
money anything for money.
Sure
Davy ...Sure babe...
from Some Like It Luke
Warm
You are listening to: The Monkees Theme